August 6th, Hospice


Today we met with the hospice nurse.  She showed us how to care for Jane and gave us two hospice options.  Option one is to stay at home and we take care of her.  Option two is for her to stay at the hospice facility.  The choice is up to the patient/family.  Jane initially said that she wanted to go to the hospice center.  It took a little bit of work to understand why, but what it came down to is that Jane did not want to be a burden us with having to take care of her.  The hospice nurse told Jane to take the “b” from burden and change to “b” in blessing.  That brought a smile to her face and helped her to understand that we are here for her and that taking care of her during this time, no mater how hard it might be,  is a blessing to us and an important way for us to express our love to her.  I also told Jane, during this time, that it was our time to take care of her after all of the time that she had taken care of me and the boys.

The prognosis

The nurse covered how to clean Jane and work with the sheets on the bed.  In the process Samuel voiced his concern about who is going to take care of Jane once school starts. We told him we would manage and that he didn’t have to worry about that part.  Shortly after that, the nurse told me that, ” in all actuality Jane’s body is showing signs of declining and she probably does not have much longer.   The nurse went through all the drugs that we had for Jane and helped us to work out a regiment that will ensure that Jane is as comfortable as possible. After we signed a bunch of paperwork, the nurse ask if we had any questions.  I asked her what we can expect and how long we have with Jane.  She told us that from all the signs, that Jane could have 3 days to 3 weeks.  I plan on taking the time off to watch and care for Jane, and take care of the boys.


Please continue to lift our family up as we support and care for Jane.  Pray for Jane as she continue to be confused, has a hard time communicating and get frustrated. Pray for Pastor Brian, who has been here to support and control visitors.

Thank you for pray for us.


5 thoughts on “August 6th, Hospice

  1. To the Arney family: We have just recently received the news about what your family is going through and our hearts are going out to all of you and are lifting you up in prayer. Love to all of you.

  2. Ray, my prayers out to the entire family. The family is lucky to have such a wonderful mother/wife in their life…but she is just as lucky to have such a unbelievably loving and supportive husband and sons to have shared many wonderful moments with. I really feel deeply about your situation and believe that it will make you even stronger than you are today. Bob

  3. Jane, please know that you are a blessing and an angel. I am thankful to God that you and your family has been such a huge and positive force to what HCWO is today. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

    Ray, if there is anything I can do, please let me/us know. I will be praying and have our MC ladies to keep you all in prayer.

    You all are loved, appreciated, and regarded in every way. May God send his angels to attend to you, His Spirit to speak to you, and His presence to comfort you.

  4. Jane Ray Sam and Gabe– While I have not been actively in your life over the years since Matt left TCS you folks have been constantly in our discussions and prayers and we will continue to lift up all of you in continued prayer– Paul

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